Mental Health Stigma

Unfortunately there is a stigma associated with mental illness. This stigma leads many people to suffer in silence. Or worse, to not seek help.

This week a friend called me Hester Prynne. You know, the heroine of Nathaniel Hawthorne's classic The Scarlet Letter. For those of you who slept through American Literature in high school, Hester committed adultery and a few  months later she birthed a daughter out of wedlock. The novel is set in Puritanical New England. So the society was big on shame and punishment. Hester did some time in jail, and when the baby was born she had to stand on a pillory for a few hours. For the rest of her life she had to wear an A emblazoned on her chest. But Hester was a seamstress. And a strong woman. She was not to be shamed. She designed an elaborate A. And instead of wearing it as a badge of shame, she took this as a chance to own her sin while simultaneously showing off her craftsmanship.

So my friend called me a modern-day Hester. Instead of shrinking from the stigma of having bipolar disorder, I have embraced it. I don't know why I don't feel the stigma. But I just don't. But I want to be the voice for those who do feel the stigma and are silenced.

I am reminded of a quotation from Audre Lorde: "When we speak we are afraid our words will not be heard or welcomed. But when we are silent, we are still afraid. So it is better to speak." Lorde, the self-defined "black, lesbian, mother, warrior, poet." Silence does not protect you.

My goal of becoming a bipolar spokesperson has been coming to fruition. By next month, I will have had three interviews (two Internet radio interviews and a blog interview) I blog here and at Huffington Post. And I'm in the midst of writing my bipolar memoir. This whole process has been incredibly therapeutic. And I hope that my life and story has been a blessing to others.

Memoir Writing Workshop

This week was the 7th class for my memoir writing workshop. The class meets every Monday in NYC (from July to September) for 10 weeks from 7pm-10pm.

In the class we have been working on the components of memoir writing: description, characterization, setting and pacing, and dialogue. We do free writes and read model texts to see the concepts in action.

We also bring our own writing. Each week two people bring 5-15 pages of their writing to be work-shopped. We discuss what worked well and what didn't. We discuss what confused us or pulled us in.

I will have my work discussed three times. The first time I used excerpts from my blog. When I first started blogging I assumed I would turn the blog into my memoir. But after hearing the feedback from my classmates I have decided not to take this route.

In my first writing (the excerpts from the blog), my classmates said it sounded too WebMD. Ha! They said that it needed more storytelling. Their assessment is accurate. That is the tone I wish my blog to have: educational and informative. But I want my memoir to feel like a story.

In my second writing, I submitted ten pages about my first and second hospitalizations. I strove very hard to turn the tales into stories. Judging by the feedback from my classmates, I succeeded. They asked for more elaboration in parts. So I'll work on continuing to flesh out the action.

I have three classes left. And I have to submit 5-15 more pages. I'm hoping to incorporate the feedback I received.

If you are interested in writing, I would highly suggest you join a writer's circle. I cannot stress to you enough the importance of getting feedback on your work.

Writing

I've always been a writer.

In high school I wrote poetry. During my senior year I even thought about publishing a book of poems. I spent weeks typing up my poems. When all was said and done I had about 200 pages.

I even contacted publishers. One sent me a mailing to send back my manuscript. Then just as fast I lost my interest in publishing my poems and never contacted the publisher. I know now that this was mania. When the mania passed so too did the interest in publishing.

Fast forward more than ten years, and here I am contemplating publishing again. This time I will follow through on it. I will be turning this blog into a memoir. Hopefully in a year or two.

Starting July 8th I'll be taking a 10-week memoir writing workshop through Gotham Writer's Workshop. I'm looking forward to it. Last summer I took a one-day memoir writing workshop through Gotham. It was a nice taste test. I'm looking forward to delving deeper than a one-day workshop allows. The 10-week workshop meets every Tuesday from 10am to 1pm. I'm looking forward to getting feedback on my work.

What do you think of my writing?

Mental Health Memoirs

I already owned these books (Carrie Fisher's Wishful Drinking and Shockaholic; Kay Redfield Jamison An Unquiet Mind), but I packed them away with the rest of my books and belongings and put them in storage. So I bought them again. I've assigned myself homework: 1) read these bipolar memoirs and 2) research bipolar disorder. All in preparation for the bipolar memoir I want to write. I think my memoir will offer something that's not on the market. I haven't seen any mental health memoirs by people of color. I'm not claiming that I'll be writing the first, but I haven't seen any others. If you know of any, please add them to the Comments section below.